The Inaugural ONE!!!

Well… Here goes!!! This is it, the first one! I just want to use this first post to explain why I decided to do this and thank some people that have been there for me over the last few months.

The idea behind "Rebuilding A Life" is to fill a void that I quickly found as I was searching for a guy's version of navigating a marital breakdown. I figured that I might as well offer something that might appeal to guys like me who care about their kids and still want to be a part of their lives. This certainly isn't meant to be a "how-to" guide or a place to seek expert advise; this is meant to serve as a chronicle of first-hand accounts about how I'm navigating my way through and what helps me get by. As you will see, writing has become an important tool for me to express my thoughts and feelings. So a venue such as this feels comfortable. Plus, it will allow me to tie-in other interests of mine such as DIY, cooking, sports and photography, making this the ideal space to combat the inevitable loneliness that can be overbearing at times (post to follow...)

I've committed myself to keep the content of this site very respectful and insightful. If you were hoping to read some juicy gossip or nosing in the details of how this all came to be... you came to the wrong place! I still very much respect my daughters' mother, she remains a very integral part of their lives and we must work together to ensure that our girls thrive despite our marriage collapsing. I'm sure we won't see eye to eye on everything (heck, we didn't before!), but that doesn't mean that we can't remain a strong parental unit for our children. Some of the best advise I've already received from experts is that sometimes, for the sake of the kids, you'll have to let go and agree to something you may not be completely on-board with because you know that in the end, they are safe and loved. This process will certainly have its ups and downs. It is, by nature, an adversarial process. Remaining calm and having plenty of patience are essential. Emotions will creep up but being weary of those will prevent bad decision-making or wrong choice of words that were said out of anger or spite. So pack a lunch buddy, you're in for the long haul!

This project wouldn't have come to be if I didn't have the strong support of numerous people. Living in another city and physically isolated from family was very hard to handle at the beginning and still is on some days even now... My parents did everything they could to battle the geography of the Canadian Shield that separate us. Both of you, in your own ways, allowed me to have the space to reflect all the while providing my kids with unconditional and infinite love , and hearing me out when I needed that as well. Even though my bros have in many ways their owns circuses to manage, I know they have my back and that they do keep tabs on me, because they care. I know that anytime I'll now get to spend with them in the outdoors will be so much more meaningful and special now moving forward. In going through this process, I also really got to see who it was that truly cared about me and who I could count on. Friendships became much stronger and more meaningful to me. Joe, you've been incredible since I shared the news with you all those months ago, in a sense you took on the role of the big brother I never had. Dave; you, your boys and Carol have been so helpful in so many ways that it's difficult to put into words. The warmth of your home and the company you provide are much needed in this time and I'm very grateful for our 12 year long friendship. Justin, you consistently pull through when I'm in a pinch! I know that I can vent some frustrations out to you and you'll do as Justin does and shoot back a sly remark that somehow makes me forget what it was I was frustrated with. All of these people were there for me when it mattered most and I will not forget that anytime soon. There are also some professionals that have been in my life that deserve some recognition here. John, your guidance in helping identify and unlock my sense of mindfulness (if that's even a word) has been instrumental in helping me remain calm and centred through this storm. Even though I haven't met you in person, you were integral to getting me back here. Eric, tu as toujours su trouver les bons mots au bon moment et ce, depuis mon adolescence. Si un jour on se croise à l'épicerie, je te dois de serrer ta main et te faire parvenir mes plus gros mercis!

So that's it for now... Thanks everyone for stopping by. By all means, share it with whomever you feel could benefit from this.

Take care,

Al